how all started....and how it ended....

Our story....or fairy tail....we met 2 years ago when his brother become our gardener...and my family helped him to make his regular documents...he was an iligally immigrant...and after some time he bringed up his brother...then when i got amaeized about the most beautiful almond and black eyes....and he got chamred by my green eyes....i was sure there it wouldnt be so easy because the diffrences were too big...and my family would have never accepted but it was different....The university came and i convinced my father go help him to go with me in the University by studying law....so i my parents tought i should handel alone my life and decided to move up alone in a flat in center milano....so we begun to visit and go out...and so we fall in love we actually move toghter and trying to have a nice and happy life...but his family managed to move him away from me...buy getting him to marry with force!!!!!!!!!!!and they say they are civilized!!!!!!!!!!!!!!i think they dont have the minimal sense of love and understnading...they didnt knew anything...i was to much for him...but did they asked him???anyway today i told him to bring my keys and i puted his things in a box and gived it to the doorman so i dont wanna see him.......no no...i cant accept this thing.....

i will survive....

well what can i say more....the news fall on my like a lighting in a summer strom..is actually summer....he is getting marryed a name called hoba....or heba...i cant remmber her name...well is not that i care that much...So now i founded out why were they laughing about....and i would have laughed also if i knew somebody in that situation....so now what's left????????just a summer to sicily....alone haveing fun and forget all...the 1001 nights are over...and the fairytales also....what a lair...i have a feeling of revege i know is not right but one day will come things go round and round...i just feel stupid....and hurt.....but i guess it wasn't to be....like his brother said.."he needs a girl with our tradition and modest....and to make him children not to think at a careere"Well i will never be one big i have a name to carry on...and from now this will be my aim...to bring up all my family gaved to me and to turn back to my old friends that i turned off bc the jelousy of somebody....i called Marco T.i dont know why even after our story ended i still want him around...funny?!i tought also he was a true friend and he came to listen to me we did a couple of martinis...and now i cant sleep....uffaaaa questa vita.....i need to leave Milano for some days...i guess Maritima will console me a lil...i dont know from where i should begin....

how others can ruine a beautiful thing...

tonight...i tought i can make fall down bridges betwin cultures...but i was wrong...invited to a dinner of an muslim family that it happends to be even my boyfriends one...persons that my family helped to get out from a poor condition and to get in legality...but this doesnt cont...but is the family of the person i gaved my heart to...

Well i dressed to impress like Audrey Hepburn in the classical Coco Chanel little black dress and the most simply pearls with some dior flats shoes...and a black scarf like a schal...and one of my favorite bags the XXL Jumbo Bag from Chanel.I tooked out the car pass and to get R.from work.Bought some sweets for the family from via Torini (at least for us is that thing,when u go to a persons house for lunch/dinner).

We get to the house...i am taking a deep breath he tells me all is gonna be ok....and get in the house.As soon as the door opens 2 women gets to greet R.i stay behind like a stupid..(i hated always to introduce myself in places where i go with somebody)after greeting all 10 family members and after staying in a corner he remmbered me i shaked all hands...of course nither in the airport at the safe controll they dont pass u trought x-rays like that..but i tryed to smile and use the charmes like i always did by looking in people eyes..they call up dinner and we sit...but the surprise came when 2 of the aunts and cousions we looking at me and laughing about me...i wanted to get 3 feet under and the probelm is that he didnt even saw it....this hurted me so much....but thanks god phone was ringing it was an sms was my best friend E.asking how it is....i told her is a nightmere...but we sit they do their praying i stay in silance analize all and then we start eating the famouse cous cous it was quite good but R. brother begun to pinch me..."the lady isnt used to this type of food"."she prefers the french cusine"and i tryed to be as diplomatic as i could by telling him"well we can always discover new things..."and i smiled then they said something in arabic and laughed i was sure they were talking about me bc i looked at R.and he looked in down.....then the ladys begun with their laugh....oh god....why why why!!!!!then one of the cousins the only girl that speakes italian said "well u wear a lot of euro on u...U think he would be able to give u those things.."I answered her that well he hasn't have to buy me this things because i can afford them by myself...Then the mother came another tragedy.....And all man looking up and down to me i told R i wanna leave...He said not yet...i told him at first bad look i go with or without u....And of course this new pinch came....from his brother,our ex-gardner-so i tooked my bag told R we will hear us the next days and the said good evening and have fun!and leaved....

Now he is calling me like a crazy.....i texted him telling him...i dont wanna talk...i think the end is coming...is really fair???Where is the problem one is rich and the other poor????!!!!!one catolic and the other muslim....my family never rejected him actully they gaved hima schoolarship to study....and have no problems.....i feel like crying.....And in this house is feeling so cold .....and i am so alone....

babe dream about me....

To begin with i choosed this song from moby...that gives me confort...and the video is from one of my favorite movies......